No Spend September: Division of Labor (Podcast #15!)

Division of Household Labor

Hello again! Jen here and we’re still no-spending, but getting really close to “overdoing it October” (ha!). In episode 15 of the podcast and our last one in #NoSpendSeptember2018, we bring up the importance of having a conversation between you and your partner about the division of labor in the house.

We encourage you to sit down and:

        1.  List out the adult chores in the house and to-dos in your family life. These include homework, making lunches, keeping track of school activities, taking kids to the doctor, taking out the trash and paying the bills, to name a few. Name all the things that need to get done. This also includes keeping the kids on track with THEIR chores that we talked about in this post. If you’re a single parent, MAJOR props!!!
        2. Figure out what you’re both willing to do (who likes that chore the least?!). A biggie here for couples is dishes, and another one is the kids’ bedtime routine. Who likes scrubbing spaghetti off the pot AGAIN and chasing the kids around with a toothbrush? Not fun! Draw straws or pick days. If your kids are helping with dishes as part of their chores, then who is the ‘enforcer’? I guess try to make it fun. My kids are really into the army right now, so we hear a lot of “Sir, yes sirs!” during dish time and table cleanup, and that definitely keeps us all laughing.
        3. Determine what is REALLY important to your partner and fit it into the week. Does your partner want to go to the gym, make music or meet up with friends? See how you can make those fun and healthy diversions happen for both of you. Tag-team parenting and chore-doing aren’t rocket science, they’re survival science!
        4. Pick a time to look at the week ahead together. Perhaps it’s a Sunday “date” on the living room couch where you look at the next 7 days and figure out who is doing what and where you might need to reach out for help. Sharing a calendar can also be really helpful. This prevents scrambling at the last minute when one kid needs to get to basketball, one kid needs to get to lacrosse and you need to attend back-to-school night. Time to enlist that carpool or call on a sitter.

     

  1. Share your family and partner responsibility systems in the comments below. We are always upgrading our methods and want to hear from you! xo, Jen & Corinne

TV-Free Family: 5 Things I’ve Learned Living Without Television

5 Things I've Learned Living Without Television

Hello! Corinne here. I’ve been wanting to share some insights I’ve gathered over the past six weeks of living TV-Free. And finally, it’s happening! When I say that we’re a TV-Free Family, I want to say that living 6 weeks without a television at home doesn’t mean we’re wedded to the idea forever.

I LOVE TELEVISION. Especially British TV shows (I’ve watched all seasons of The Great British Baking Show, Doc Martin, and Father Brown, Sherlock, and the list goes on—more times than I’d like to admit). It’s just that this experiment has been incredible and I wanted to share why.

I’m going to keep this post short and sweet though. My oldest two kids, Grace (3) and Audrey (7) were becoming TV addicts. They could zone out for hours at a time watching a show they’d seen 10 times before. (I wasn’t much better.) So when the TV went kaput one night, I turned to my husband Steve and said, “what if we didn’t replace it?” And we didn’t.

Sure there was some whining from the kids the first few days, but it subsided pretty quickly.

Here’s what I’ve observed from our tv-free family experiment:

We started doing new things (or more of the things that I always hoped we would do!).

We went to the library for the first time as a family (and have kept going weekly). The kids are comfortable talking to the librarians about books they’d like to find, we get 20-30 books out each week, and we’re getting out of the house and doing something for free! Total win. Also, the kids started asking to go outside more. They’ve spent countless hours digging in the dirt for worms, playing pretend in the backyard, and getting the back deck covered in play-doh or kinetic sand (rather than our kitchen floor). Another win. I guess a little boredom inside can really motivate a kid to go outdoors, who knew?!

We cook and eat more meals together as a family. 

We have a couple of step stools in the kitchen and my girls like to stand next to me while I get dinner ready. They love spending time together, stirring and measuring, and I feel so good about what they’re learning about food and the importance of family dinners. It’s a little slower and chaotic and sometimes it ends with me saying, “everyone out of the kitchen!” but most of the time I’m really glad we did it.

We do mundane things as a family and they’re more fun! 

Now that we aren’t glued to the latest episode of Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, we’re happy to go as a family of five on a trip to Home Depot or the grocery store. Yes, I still enjoy the time I get alone on errands, but when we have the chance to go as a family, there’s always a funny moment to remember (there are probably tears or a tantrum from one of the kids too—but that would’ve happened at home anyway!) AND I’ve become much more comfortable with the kids in public, especially when things don’t go perfectly. It is what it is and I don’t waste as much time worrying about what everyone else might be thinking of one of the kids having a fit.

Morning and evening routines are easier with the kids.

We don’t have to deal with, “one more show, pleeeeaaaase!” when we’re asking them to brush their teeth, eat breakfast, get their PJs or clothes on, etc. This cuts way down on battles over the essentials of everyday life. Also, I’ve magically found time to go for a 20-minute walk most mornings and read before bed at night. This has been a total game changer for my energy and mental health throughout the day.

We found a way to enjoy movies and shows without a tv. 

We bought this projector, this adaptor, and this screen, and our living room transform into a home theater on Friday nights. Suddenly our popcorn popper was popping and movies like The Greatest Showman, Mary Poppins, Shrek, and The Goonies are so much more special when we haven’t been watching TV throughout the week.

The verdict on our 6-week tv-free family experiment…

I’m not sure if we’ll go back to TV any time soon. I definitely want to see if being a tv-free family helps make life more manageable during the school year. Most of all, I’ve just enjoyed being more present—whether it’s with the kids or when I have some time to myself (or with my husband) after the kids go to bed. Plus, we’ll be traveling to different friends and family’s homes on Sundays this fall during football season. Have you ever taken a TV hiatus?

In veggies and mud pies we trust,

Corinne