The Water Solution: Younger Skin, More Energy, and Less Flab

Photo credit: Greg Riegler Photography

Most people (90% of the US population) are dehydrated. While you might not be exhibiting serious signs like vomiting at random and walking around as grog central, your body is still not operating at optimal capacity, your energy level is much lousier than it could be, and you’re storing fat and making wrinkles at mach speed. Health Unicorns, let’s get this under control. No more excuses. Here’s why you need water, how much, and tricks for getting it:


  • Your skin needs constant hydration. Raisins are dehydrated grapes. Do you like the way raisins look?
  • Discourage chunkiness. Without enough H2O, your kidneys stink at their crucial jobs and your liver picks up the slack… and your liver can no longer do it’s main job of breaking down fat, which encourages fat storage and cellulite on your rumpus.
  • Better sleep, faster metabolism, more energy. Your body is more at peace when it gets enough agua. Without it, you’re restless, slowed down, and strung out. And people notice.
  • Detoxification Nation. Toxins (anything from pollutants, food additives, and heavy metals) can’t white water raft the river out if there’s no river.


  • Method 1: Half your body weight in ounces. If you weigh 162 lbs, you need 81 oz of water per day (~2.5 liters).
  • Method 2: The Replacement Method. You lose 1.5 liters in urine, and 1 liter through breathing, sweating, and BMs each day. Your super healthy diet is ~20% water, so get at least 2 liters per day.
  • Method 3: The Man/Woman Approach. Men: 3 liters per day. Women: 2 liters per day (pregnant or breastfeeding women: 3 liters per day).


  • Drink 8 oz at the start of each meal or snack. Make sure it’s filtered.
  • Get the coolest looking refillable bottle at the most posh store. Keep it at your desk and refill it every time you come back from the loo.
  • Drink water while you’re waiting for your coffee to brew, pasta water to boil, and child to stop asking for a second dessert.
  • Seltzer it or add cucumber slices, or lemon, lime, or orange wedges for a new spin. Add a dash of cayenne pepper to increase it’s detoxifying power.
  • Herbal teas count, and some give you better digestion (ginger, peppermint), better sleep (chamomile), and whiter teeth (I’m sure there’s one).
  • Avoid diet sodas and artificial sweeteners to meet fluid needs. They leave your body wondering why it didn’t get any sugar out of the sweet-tasting beverage, causing you to eventually crave and scavenge for sugary treats.
  • Caffeinated beverages actually aren’t “negative fluid” if you’re a regular user. You get 80-90% of that fluid. But nothing is as good as straight-up filtered H2O. Did you read recently about how too much caffeine can make you hear voices, specifically Bing Crosby singing White Christmas?
  • Take more showers and get it through osmosis. Ha! Don’t you wish?!
  • If none of these tricks work, just bite the bullet and chug. You might like how you feel after a few days!
Other secrets to staying hydrated? And did you know hot water weighs less than cold?

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